occucco ][ ssf.tsf.ffne

I just video chatted with Olivia for over an hour and a half. It was so nice to see a familiar face from Mount Holyoke, and to be able to talk about things that people here do not necessarily know about or understand. (For example: the ugly, weird designs that people came up with for our dorm 2010-2011 sweatshirt...a Hamster? Really?) We spoke about Christmas, we showed each other our cats, I said "hello again" to her mum and dad, we talked about spring break and transferring and how complicated it makes the housing application process. I vented about my frustrations with certain things here at home and she lent a willing ear. Olivia is my best friend at school by far, and having met her parents during Family & Friends' Weekend, I feel almost as if I know her the way I know many of my high school friends--because there is that element of knowing more than just your friend, because you are familiar with not just her but also the people in her life.

A few days ago, I told Katie that the one thing that made me sad about leaving Mount Holyoke for break was that I did not think I would miss any of my friends, at least not too tremendously. Skyping with Olivia tonight instilled within me the hope and positivity that of late has been dwindling. I miss her so much and cannot wait to see her again in a month. Having a reason to actually want to return to school makes the arrival of January 24th that much easier.

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In other words, I just wish you would talk to me, and not while hiding behind your cell phone. I do not know if you are afraid or are angry or are indifferent. I hope so very much, though, that indifference is not the reason for your lack of enthusiasm, because nothing could hurt me more. If it is not too much to ask, perhaps my Christmas present could be old-fashioned communication. I would like that.