Today I really tried to begin "inviting" people into my life. It's a tough surface to break and a deep distance to penetrate, but I'm determined to get through it. There is no reason why my life, my love, needs any sort of cap or limit.
Currently I am supposed to be writing a research essay on pinhole cameras, which I actually happen to find fascinating since I was first introduced to one in August. The first pinhole camera was actually invented by the same Scottish chap who invented the kaleidoscope, which I think is the coolest conincidence ever. In any case, I'm itching to build a pinhole camera of my own. (Cue me looking for an oatmeal can to tear apart, then allowing Doubt to scream into my ear, "You're not smart enough!" and back away snickering as I sigh and place the container back on the cabinet shelf.) I'm not sure why I always place these roadblocks in front of myself, because I know if I thought about it I probably definitely could make a pinhole camera, and how truly wonderful would that be? But... I don't know. Physics is a tough concept for me to grasp. I just cannot seem to wrap my mind around it. It's too.....huge.
Anyway, I'm supposed to be writing an essay on the structure and functions of pinhole cameras. I'd much rather sift through the pages upon virtual pages of pinhole photographs that keep occurring on my Google results page. The things people have captured without even using a lens astound me. Science is brilliant, which maybe sounds redundant but truly, positively, I feel like these theories and concepts aren't theories and concepts but just these fantastic results, these fantastic THINGS sitting in front of me, surrounding me, 190,000,000 miles away from me on the other side of the planet. Taking them apart so we understand them is an honorable mission, and one I don't challenge. But for me, personally, I appreciate science as this abstract marvel of a thing.
Needless to say I haven't written my essay yet. I did go to the library to check out some books on pinhole cameras (mostly for my own personal interest when--IF--I find a spare moment to actually read something of my own volition), but the Gale Free had none. Maybe I'm one of the few people who frequent the non-fiction section, but the basement is my favorite part of the library and sadly it lacks books on so many amazing topics. If I had money I would throw it at them (figuratively-speaking, though literally throwing it at them could be entertaining) and encourage them to buys books on composting and books about pinhole cameras and all of the Rod McKuen volumes they can get their hands on.
I am seriously considering closing the Microsoft document I've had open for the last two hours, which has barely any writing save a few abstract phrases and snippets of information. The depth of field is infinite, but optical blurring can occur: it just doesn't depend on object distance. Out of context, essay aside, forgetting physics altogether... that is absolutely beautiful.
I wish I could write about science in exactly the manner I feel. Unfortunately there seems to be little room in physics for flowery ponderings on concrete knowledge.
On another note... I accidentally stumbled upon this blog today. I can't read it (despite years of Spanish it never stuck), but I don't think words are needed. The image alone made me laugh so hard. Obscurity is the most humorous thing to me.